Now, back to my words of wisdom. We have...
How to
handle a dumb brunette.
For those of you who think only
blonds can be dumb, let me set you straight.
Although I’ve never done any scientific study, rest assured someone has,
I pretty certain that hair color has nothing to do with one’s intelligence of
lack thereof. Take for example my
sister.
Her name is Avi and she is the
epitome of a person who is dumb. I mean,
we are talking mouth hanging open, blank thousand yard stare, can answer a one
plus one question dumb.
For example…
How can a ten-year-old who has no
money and no means of getting money download over $500 dollars of music and
books onto an eReader? The answer…
fanfare please… get someone else’s credit card and use it. Now we know many people have done this in the
past and some have been more ingenious than others at this task, but to you the
card and have the purchased goods going to your
own device? Who was that comedian
with the sign and where is he when you need him? You don’t do things like that? Not unless you really enjoy being on some
type of punishment. Not the mention the
loss of your eReader after you took the time to get everything that you wanted
downloaded.
Another lesson – if you’re going
to sign your guardian’s name to your homework, make sure that you can actually
spell her name. Wow, I had a field day with that one. The
best way to accomplish this feat is to get copies of the actual signature to
use as a guide. Oh, and make sure your teachers haven’t actually met or at the
least spoken with the person you are trying to pass yourself off as. If, for example, the teachers know your adult
is not going to sign homework that has not been completed or is not up to what
the adult will normally okay, I am begging you- do not put your or rather her
signature on the paper because you can expect the dreaded phone call.
My sister is very special and I
love her very much. Now as soon as she’s
out of solitary, I may even be able to see her again.
